• Semi-Homemade with Sandra Lee: WalMart Stewart Goes to the WalMart Vine

    From Ubiquitous@3:633/10 to All on Tue Dec 2 04:41:07 2025
    Subject: Semi-Homemade with Sandra Lee: WalMart Stewart Goes to the WalMart Vineyard


    Today's color: lavender.
    Setting: The Walmart vineyard
    Theme: Cheese.

    HUH?

    Apparently she has imaginary alcoholic relatives now. Wow, outdoor
    lighting does NOT look good on her.

    Nice editing out of "Cheeze Whiz" (s/r "Cheese. In a jar!") and then a
    quick explanation of why she loves it. Whatever. How many cheeses were in
    that six-cheese sauce, anyway? I'd love to see SLop make her own
    tortellini.

    I loved how SLop brought that cheeze sauce to a full boil. I am positive
    it's burnt on the bottom by the little black bits perculating up.

    Again with the inept "Cheese. In a jar!" post-production editing. Oh,
    one is sppsd to put the sauce ONTO the pasta, not dump it in with the
    sauce.

    I have never heard someone make so many scraping and screeching noises
    as he (or she) cooked in my life.

    Loved how her bad case of the "drunken shakes" resulted in varying sized
    and unevenly-folded calzones. I'm sure the guests just LOVED that ("Do I
    take a small overcooked one or suffer through a large undercooked one?".
    And she baked them in a toaster oven? At 20 minutes a batch? Just. damn.
    Using the fork on the edges may be professional, but it only serves to emphasise your uneven edges. Lookit SLop's reaction to the hot calzone
    she just stuffed into her mouth! Ha-HA! (a la Nelson)

    It takes her "hours" to make poached pears so she uses canned and then
    she tells us to save the "juice" from the can. It's called "syrup", you
    big dummy! So she strains them, then puts them back into the can!

    Round petit fours, cut from frozen cheese-cake so it doesn't stick to
    the mini-cookie cutters. Wouldn't dipping them in warm water do the
    same? Look, they're still sticking. Some tip! That cheesecake looks like
    it was mauled. How is one sppsd to eat those "petit fours" with all that
    glop oozing down the sides and stacked up with that sauce and
    starwberries and mint.

    After she added that glop of canned raspberry to that port sauce, it
    looked like something clotted menses. Yuck.

    Oh yeah, what a great tip for a impromptu bar; Two wine barrels and a
    hunk of plywood... Oh yeah, I have those in my garage. Oh yum, wine from
    a box and grape juice. Served at a vineyard.

    SLop makes a cheap-ass momento for her "aunt" and "uncle". As if a night
    in the bathroom spewing forth from both ends wasn't more than enough.

    Oh yeah, the tablescape featured bonsai christmas trees. Yeah, like I
    want to have to lean around the centerpiece to talk to whomever is on
    the far side of the table.


    --
    WARNING!!!
    Use of these recipes may be hazardous to your health, food budget,
    standing in your community and liver function. Use at your own risk!! We assume no liability from any illness or injury sustained while eating
    the "food" or being exposed to crapass tablescapes. And no, we're not
    sure where she grew up either. The Cordon Bleu disavows any knowlege of
    Miss Lee.



    --- PyGate Linux v1.5.1
    * Origin: Dragon's Lair, PyGate NNTP<>Fido Gate (3:633/10)
  • From anim8rfsk@3:633/10 to All on Tue Dec 2 09:23:26 2025
    Subject: Re: Semi-Homemade with Sandra Lee: WalMart Stewart Goes to the WalMart Vineyard

    Ubiquitous <weberm@polaris.net> wrote:

    Today's color: lavender.
    Setting: The Walmart vineyard
    Theme: Cheese.

    HUH?

    Apparently she has imaginary alcoholic relatives now. Wow, outdoor
    lighting does NOT look good on her.

    Nice editing out of "Cheeze Whiz" (s/r "Cheese. In a jar!") and then a
    quick explanation of why she loves it. Whatever. How many cheeses were in that six-cheese sauce, anyway? I'd love to see SLop make her own
    tortellini.

    I loved how SLop brought that cheeze sauce to a full boil. I am positive it's burnt on the bottom by the little black bits perculating up.

    Again with the inept "Cheese. In a jar!" post-production editing. Oh,
    one is sppsd to put the sauce ONTO the pasta, not dump it in with the
    sauce.

    I have never heard someone make so many scraping and screeching noises
    as he (or she) cooked in my life.

    Loved how her bad case of the "drunken shakes" resulted in varying sized
    and unevenly-folded calzones. I'm sure the guests just LOVED that ("Do I take a small overcooked one or suffer through a large undercooked one?".
    And she baked them in a toaster oven? At 20 minutes a batch? Just. damn. Using the fork on the edges may be professional, but it only serves to emphasise your uneven edges. Lookit SLop's reaction to the hot calzone
    she just stuffed into her mouth! Ha-HA! (a la Nelson)

    It takes her "hours" to make poached pears so she uses canned and then
    she tells us to save the "juice" from the can. It's called "syrup", you
    big dummy! So she strains them, then puts them back into the can!

    Round petit fours, cut from frozen cheese-cake so it doesn't stick to
    the mini-cookie cutters. Wouldn't dipping them in warm water do the
    same? Look, they're still sticking. Some tip! That cheesecake looks like
    it was mauled. How is one sppsd to eat those "petit fours" with all that glop oozing down the sides and stacked up with that sauce and
    starwberries and mint.

    After she added that glop of canned raspberry to that port sauce, it
    looked like something clotted menses. Yuck.

    Oh yeah, what a great tip for a impromptu bar; Two wine barrels and a
    hunk of plywood... Oh yeah, I have those in my garage. Oh yum, wine from
    a box and grape juice. Served at a vineyard.

    SLop makes a cheap-ass momento for her "aunt" and "uncle". As if a night
    in the bathroom spewing forth from both ends wasn't more than enough.

    Oh yeah, the tablescape featured bonsai christmas trees. Yeah, like I
    want to have to lean around the centerpiece to talk to whomever is on
    the far side of the table.



    Where are you seeing this?

    --
    The last thing I want to do is hurt you, but it is still on my list.

    --- PyGate Linux v1.5.1
    * Origin: Dragon's Lair, PyGate NNTP<>Fido Gate (3:633/10)
  • From Ubiquitous@3:633/10 to All on Wed Dec 3 04:30:43 2025
    Subject: Re: Semi-Homemade with Sandra Lee: WalMart Stewart Goes to the WalMart Vineyard

    anim8rfsk@cox.net wrote:
    Ubiquitous <weberm@polaris.net> wrote:

    Today's color: lavender.
    Setting: The Walmart vineyard
    Theme: Cheese.

    HUH?

    Apparently she has imaginary alcoholic relatives now. Wow, outdoor
    lighting does NOT look good on her.

    Nice editing out of "Cheeze Whiz" (s/r "Cheese. In a jar!") and then a
    quick explanation of why she loves it. Whatever. How many cheeses were in >> that six-cheese sauce, anyway? I'd love to see SLop make her own
    tortellini.

    I loved how SLop brought that cheeze sauce to a full boil. I am positive
    it's burnt on the bottom by the little black bits perculating up.

    Again with the inept "Cheese. In a jar!" post-production editing. Oh,
    one is sppsd to put the sauce ONTO the pasta, not dump it in with the
    sauce.

    I have never heard someone make so many scraping and screeching noises
    as he (or she) cooked in my life.

    Loved how her bad case of the "drunken shakes" resulted in varying sized
    and unevenly-folded calzones. I'm sure the guests just LOVED that ("Do I
    take a small overcooked one or suffer through a large undercooked one?".
    And she baked them in a toaster oven? At 20 minutes a batch? Just. damn.
    Using the fork on the edges may be professional, but it only serves to
    emphasise your uneven edges. Lookit SLop's reaction to the hot calzone
    she just stuffed into her mouth! Ha-HA! (a la Nelson)

    It takes her "hours" to make poached pears so she uses canned and then
    she tells us to save the "juice" from the can. It's called "syrup", you
    big dummy! So she strains them, then puts them back into the can!

    Round petit fours, cut from frozen cheese-cake so it doesn't stick to
    the mini-cookie cutters. Wouldn't dipping them in warm water do the
    same? Look, they're still sticking. Some tip! That cheesecake looks like
    it was mauled. How is one sppsd to eat those "petit fours" with all that
    glop oozing down the sides and stacked up with that sauce and
    starwberries and mint.

    After she added that glop of canned raspberry to that port sauce, it
    looked like something clotted menses. Yuck.

    Oh yeah, what a great tip for a impromptu bar; Two wine barrels and a
    hunk of plywood... Oh yeah, I have those in my garage. Oh yum, wine from
    a box and grape juice. Served at a vineyard.

    SLop makes a cheap-ass momento for her "aunt" and "uncle". As if a night
    in the bathroom spewing forth from both ends wasn't more than enough.

    Oh yeah, the tablescape featured bonsai christmas trees. Yeah, like I
    want to have to lean around the centerpiece to talk to whomever is on
    the far side of the table.

    Where are you seeing this?

    Computer sez: Food Network, Discovery+, Amazon Prime, YouTube, Apple+



    --- PyGate Linux v1.5.1
    * Origin: Dragon's Lair, PyGate NNTP<>Fido Gate (3:633/10)
  • From anim8rfsk@3:633/10 to All on Thu Dec 4 11:31:35 2025
    Subject: Re: Semi-Homemade with Sandra Lee: WalMart Stewart Goes to the WalMart Vineyard

    Ubiquitous <weberm@polaris.net> wrote:
    anim8rfsk@cox.net wrote:
    Ubiquitous <weberm@polaris.net> wrote:

    Today's color: lavender.
    Setting: The Walmart vineyard
    Theme: Cheese.

    HUH?

    Apparently she has imaginary alcoholic relatives now. Wow, outdoor
    lighting does NOT look good on her.

    Nice editing out of "Cheeze Whiz" (s/r "Cheese. In a jar!") and then a
    quick explanation of why she loves it. Whatever. How many cheeses were in >>> that six-cheese sauce, anyway? I'd love to see SLop make her own
    tortellini.

    I loved how SLop brought that cheeze sauce to a full boil. I am positive >>> it's burnt on the bottom by the little black bits perculating up.

    Again with the inept "Cheese. In a jar!" post-production editing. Oh,
    one is sppsd to put the sauce ONTO the pasta, not dump it in with the
    sauce.

    I have never heard someone make so many scraping and screeching noises
    as he (or she) cooked in my life.

    Loved how her bad case of the "drunken shakes" resulted in varying sized >>> and unevenly-folded calzones. I'm sure the guests just LOVED that ("Do I >>> take a small overcooked one or suffer through a large undercooked one?". >>> And she baked them in a toaster oven? At 20 minutes a batch? Just. damn. >>> Using the fork on the edges may be professional, but it only serves to
    emphasise your uneven edges. Lookit SLop's reaction to the hot calzone
    she just stuffed into her mouth! Ha-HA! (a la Nelson)

    It takes her "hours" to make poached pears so she uses canned and then
    she tells us to save the "juice" from the can. It's called "syrup", you >>> big dummy! So she strains them, then puts them back into the can!

    Round petit fours, cut from frozen cheese-cake so it doesn't stick to
    the mini-cookie cutters. Wouldn't dipping them in warm water do the
    same? Look, they're still sticking. Some tip! That cheesecake looks like >>> it was mauled. How is one sppsd to eat those "petit fours" with all that >>> glop oozing down the sides and stacked up with that sauce and
    starwberries and mint.

    After she added that glop of canned raspberry to that port sauce, it
    looked like something clotted menses. Yuck.

    Oh yeah, what a great tip for a impromptu bar; Two wine barrels and a
    hunk of plywood... Oh yeah, I have those in my garage. Oh yum, wine from >>> a box and grape juice. Served at a vineyard.

    SLop makes a cheap-ass momento for her "aunt" and "uncle". As if a night >>> in the bathroom spewing forth from both ends wasn't more than enough.

    Oh yeah, the tablescape featured bonsai christmas trees. Yeah, like I
    want to have to lean around the centerpiece to talk to whomever is on
    the far side of the table.

    Where are you seeing this?

    Computer sez: Food Network, Discovery+, Amazon Prime, YouTube, Apple+


    Plex, Tubi ?

    Gads, I?ve been dodging bullets left and right.


    --
    The last thing I want to do is hurt you, but it is still on my list.

    --- PyGate Linux v1.5.1
    * Origin: Dragon's Lair, PyGate NNTP<>Fido Gate (3:633/10)