CALIFORNIA:

The Governor of California is jogging with his dog on a nature trail. A coyote jumps out and attacks the governor's dog, then bites the governor. The
governor starts to intervene, then reflects on the movie BAMBI and realizes he should stop because the coyote is only doing what is natural.

He calls animal control, which bills the state $200 for disease testing and $500 dollars for relocating the coyote.

The governor calls a veterinarian, who collects the dead dog and bills the state $200 for disease testing and $1000 for disposing of the corpse.

The governor goes to hospital, spends $3500 getting checked for diseases and infection and getting his bite wound stitched up and bandaged.

The nature trail is shut down for six months while Fish & Game conducts a $100,000 survey to ensure the area is now free of dangerous animals.

The governor spends $50,000 in state funds implementing a coyote awareness program for residents of the area.

The state legislature spends $2,000,000 to determine how to better treat
rabies and how to permanently eradicate the disease throughout the world.

The governor's security agent is fired for not stopping the attack and the state spends $150,000 to hire and train a new agent with additional special training regarding coyote threat management.

PETA protests the coyote's relocation and files a $5 million lawsuit against the state.


TEXAS:

The Governor of Texas is jogging with his dog on a nature trail. A coyote
jumps out and attacks the governor's dog. The governor shoots the coyote with his state-issued pistol and keeps jogging.

The governor has spent 50 cents on a .45-caliber hollow point cartridge. The buzzards eat the dead coyote.

And that, my friends, is why California is broke and Texas is not.


(h/t to anim8r for finding this for me.)



--- PyGate Linux v1.5.11
* Origin: Dragon's Lair, PyGate NNTP<>Fido Gate (3:633/10)

BTR1701 <atropos@mac.com> wrote:

CALIFORNIA:

The Governor of California is jogging with his dog on a nature trail. A >coyote jumps out and attacks the governor's dog, then bites the
governor. The governor starts to intervene, then reflects on the movie
BAMBI and realizes he should stop because the coyote is only doing what
is natural.

While the story made me smile and there is plenty of truth in it, one must assume the coyote is rabid and is not doing what is natural. Why didn't
the dog alert?

I tend to walk my dog overnight. I don't wake up in the middle of the
night every night, but when I do, the dog is always ready and willing.
We have encountered juvenile coyotes. The dog always alerts but acts
more like encountering another dog being walked than danger. In an
afternoon walk, we have encountered foxes. I have no idea if there are
wolves around here but we've never encountered one.

The most reaction I get from the dog is upon encountering the most
dangerous creature of all, a squirrel.

TEXAS:

The Governor of Texas is jogging with his dog on a nature trail. A coyote >jumps out and attacks the governor's dog. The governor shoots the coyote with >his state-issued pistol and keeps jogging.

He shot the animal? Doesn't he know that you drop an anvil on his head?

The governor has spent 50 cents on a .45-caliber hollow point cartridge. The >buzzards eat the dead coyote.

And that, my friends, is why California is broke and Texas is not.

(h/t to anim8r for finding this for me.)

--- PyGate Linux v1.5.11
* Origin: Dragon's Lair, PyGate NNTP<>Fido Gate (3:633/10)

On 2026-02-16 3:54 p.m., Adam H. Kerman wrote:

BTR1701 <atropos@mac.com> wrote:

CALIFORNIA:

The Governor of California is jogging with his dog on a nature trail. A
coyote jumps out and attacks the governor's dog, then bites the
governor. The governor starts to intervene, then reflects on the movie
BAMBI and realizes he should stop because the coyote is only doing what
is natural.

While the story made me smile and there is plenty of truth in it, one must assume the coyote is rabid and is not doing what is natural.

Why? We only know that the coyote attacked the dog, not that the coyote
was rabid. It's reasonable that it was tested for rabies in any case but
maybe it was just ultra-aggressive (or stupid).

Why didn't
the dog alert?

I tend to walk my dog overnight. I don't wake up in the middle of the
night every night, but when I do, the dog is always ready and willing.
We have encountered juvenile coyotes. The dog always alerts but acts
more like encountering another dog being walked than danger.

Interesting. I would have thought coyotes smell different than dogs and
are therefore concerning to the dog.

In an
afternoon walk, we have encountered foxes. I have no idea if there are
wolves around here but we've never encountered one.

How did the dog react to the foxes?

The most reaction I get from the dog is upon encountering the most
dangerous creature of all, a squirrel.

TEXAS:

The Governor of Texas is jogging with his dog on a nature trail. A coyote
jumps out and attacks the governor's dog. The governor shoots the coyote with
his state-issued pistol and keeps jogging.

He shot the animal? Doesn't he know that you drop an anvil on his head?

The governor has spent 50 cents on a .45-caliber hollow point cartridge. The >> buzzards eat the dead coyote.

And that, my friends, is why California is broke and Texas is not.

(h/t to anim8r for finding this for me.)

--
Rhino

--- PyGate Linux v1.5.11
* Origin: Dragon's Lair, PyGate NNTP<>Fido Gate (3:633/10)

Rhino <no_offline_contact@example.com> wrote:

On 2026-02-16 3:54 p.m., Adam H. Kerman wrote:

BTR1701 <atropos@mac.com> wrote:

CALIFORNIA:

The Governor of California is jogging with his dog on a nature trail. A >>>coyote jumps out and attacks the governor's dog, then bites the
governor. The governor starts to intervene, then reflects on the movie >>>BAMBI and realizes he should stop because the coyote is only doing what >>>is natural.

While the story made me smile and there is plenty of truth in it, one must >>assume the coyote is rabid and is not doing what is natural.

Why? We only know that the coyote attacked the dog, not that the coyote
was rabid. It's reasonable that it was tested for rabies in any case but >maybe it was just ultra-aggressive (or stupid).

A coyote may grab a little white dog left unattended in a back yard as
prey. Under normal circumstances, they don't attack at random. The
governor, dog, and security detail would be seen as a pack capable of
defending its members. No coyote would attack normally.

Why didn't the dog alert?

I tend to walk my dog overnight. I don't wake up in the middle of the
night every night, but when I do, the dog is always ready and willing.
We have encountered juvenile coyotes. The dog always alerts but acts
more like encountering another dog being walked than danger.

Interesting. I would have thought coyotes smell different than dogs and
are therefore concerning to the dog.

Every canine has a unique smell. My dog is quite friendly.

In an
afternoon walk, we have encountered foxes. I have no idea if there are >>wolves around here but we've never encountered one.

How did the dog react to the foxes?

Alerted without seeing a major threat

. . .

--- PyGate Linux v1.5.11
* Origin: Dragon's Lair, PyGate NNTP<>Fido Gate (3:633/10)

On 2026-02-16 3:54 p.m., Adam H. Kerman wrote:

BTR1701 <atropos@mac.com> wrote:

CALIFORNIA:

The Governor of California is jogging with his dog on a nature trail. A
coyote jumps out and attacks the governor's dog, then bites the
governor. The governor starts to intervene, then reflects on the movie
BAMBI and realizes he should stop because the coyote is only doing what
is natural.

While the story made me smile and there is plenty of truth in it, one must assume the coyote is rabid and is not doing what is natural. Why didn't
the dog alert?

I tend to walk my dog overnight. I don't wake up in the middle of the
night every night, but when I do, the dog is always ready and willing.
We have encountered juvenile coyotes. The dog always alerts but acts
more like encountering another dog being walked than danger. In an
afternoon walk, we have encountered foxes. I have no idea if there are
wolves around here but we've never encountered one.

The most reaction I get from the dog is upon encountering the most
dangerous creature of all, a squirrel.

TEXAS:

The Governor of Texas is jogging with his dog on a nature trail. A coyote
jumps out and attacks the governor's dog. The governor shoots the coyote with
his state-issued pistol and keeps jogging.

He shot the animal? Doesn't he know that you drop an anvil on his head?

The governor has spent 50 cents on a .45-caliber hollow point cartridge. The >> buzzards eat the dead coyote.

And that, my friends, is why California is broke and Texas is not.

(h/t to anim8r for finding this for me.)

Ontario is much closer to California as these things go. When I lived in London (Ontario), there was a provincial park not too far away that
regularly had deer and some of the locals noticed that the deer were
rather thin and scruffy-looking. They had also seen Bambi and decided
that these poor deer were hungry so they needed to be fed. Before too
long, the government was putting out food for them and, what do you
know, the deer population positively boomed! (A result even an idiot
could have predicted: put deer on welfare and there are going to be more deer!) So much so that London started seeing much larger number of deer
than it was used to seeing. (A guy in our book club had his backyard
backing on to Sifton Bog which was an area where lots of deer gathered
and I saw them myself.) Soon there were so many deer that they started becoming a problem, knocking down fences and damaging property so that
they could get at backyard gardens. The property damage upset many
people and they demanded action from the municipal government. Most of
the sentiment seemed to be in favour of a cull. The government, of
course, had to listen to activists who were dead set against a cull. The activists argued for relocation of the deer but the cost was
prohibitive. They argued against the use of poisons for fear that other animals might be inadvertently poisoned. (Fair enough.) They were beside themselves when someone proposed that hunters be allowed to take the
deer with hunting rifles because guns are icky, always and in every circumstance, and besides, they were noisy. Then a group of bowhunters
came forward and offered to do the cull but the activists shot that down
too if I'm not mistaken. I don't know if a cull ever happened or if the council simply let itself be bullied out of every possible solution.
Maybe they just put out more food so that the deer population could
increase still further?

[Research break] I just found this chronology showing what the Upper
Thames Valley Conservation Authority did about the deer. (The river
running through London, Ontario is also called the Thames River.)

https://thamesriver.on.ca/parks-recreation-natural-areas/londons-esas/sifton-bog/white-tailed-deer-in-sifton-bog/

Pathetic! They first noticed the problem officially in 2000. Nine years
later, when the report ended, they seemed to have done absolutely
nothing but study the matter without coming to any conclusions except
that a small bow hunt to test the feasibility of that approach should
NOT be done and that maybe a fine for people who fed the deer should be considered although they never implemented it. A classic example of
"moving at the speed of government"....

--
Rhino

--- PyGate Linux v1.5.11
* Origin: Dragon's Lair, PyGate NNTP<>Fido Gate (3:633/10)

On Feb 16, 2026 at 3:28:46 PM PST, "Rhino" <no_offline_contact@example.com> wrote:

On 2026-02-16 3:54 p.m., Adam H. Kerman wrote:

BTR1701 <atropos@mac.com> wrote:

CALIFORNIA:

The Governor of California is jogging with his dog on a nature trail. A >>> coyote jumps out and attacks the governor's dog, then bites the
governor. The governor starts to intervene, then reflects on the movie
BAMBI and realizes he should stop because the coyote is only doing what >>> is natural.

While the story made me smile and there is plenty of truth in it, one must >> assume the coyote is rabid and is not doing what is natural. Why didn't
the dog alert?

I tend to walk my dog overnight. I don't wake up in the middle of the
night every night, but when I do, the dog is always ready and willing.
We have encountered juvenile coyotes. The dog always alerts but acts
more like encountering another dog being walked than danger. In an
afternoon walk, we have encountered foxes. I have no idea if there are
wolves around here but we've never encountered one.

The most reaction I get from the dog is upon encountering the most
dangerous creature of all, a squirrel.

TEXAS:

The Governor of Texas is jogging with his dog on a nature trail. A coyote >>> jumps out and attacks the governor's dog. The governor shoots the coyote >>> with
his state-issued pistol and keeps jogging.

He shot the animal? Doesn't he know that you drop an anvil on his head?

The governor has spent 50 cents on a .45-caliber hollow point cartridge. The
buzzards eat the dead coyote.

And that, my friends, is why California is broke and Texas is not.

(h/t to anim8r for finding this for me.)

Ontario is much closer to California as these things go. When I lived in London (Ontario), there was a provincial park not too far away that regularly had deer and some of the locals noticed that the deer were
rather thin and scruffy-looking. They had also seen Bambi and decided
that these poor deer were hungry so they needed to be fed. Before too
long, the government was putting out food for them and, what do you
know, the deer population positively boomed! (A result even an idiot
could have predicted: put deer on welfare and there are going to be more deer!)

Years ago when I was working visits at Camp David, the Marines there talked about how the deer population was so out-of-control that they were literally clearing the forest floor of all new growth. They'd eat the sapling trees and bushes before they could get big enough to survive and as a result, other than the old growth trees, the forest was completely bare, which was a problem because the thick forest undergrowth is a significant security feature for
Camp David. It blocks lines of sight to the presidential cabin, etc. and now
it was gone, so the Secret Service and the Marines wanted to do something
about the deer. They put out a solicitation for hunters in the area to hold a mass cull.

Of course PETA and the other eco-kooks threw a fit, claiming it was kinder to the deer to let them starve and freeze to death than to cull the herd down to
a manageable level and donate the venison to local homeless shelters. They
held protests and threatened injunctions, basically all the crap they normally do to get in the way of normal life.

Rather than fight it, the government publicly conceded, waited a few months
for the whole thing to blow over, then quietly brought in the ATF at night
with silenced rifles and NVGs and had them shoot hundreds of deer. They loaded the deer into big freezer trucks and took them halfway across the country
where a sudden influx of venison at shelters wouldn't draw any notice and within a few months, the forest started growing back.

The only problem is that by using stealth mode, PETA was able to claim victory and say, "See? If you just leave nature alone, it solves its own problems."



--- PyGate Linux v1.5.11
* Origin: Dragon's Lair, PyGate NNTP<>Fido Gate (3:633/10)

On Mon, 16 Feb 2026 23:50:58 -0000 (UTC), BTR1701 <atropos@mac.com>
wrote:

On Feb 16, 2026 at 3:28:46 PM PST, "Rhino" <no_offline_contact@example.com> >wrote:

On 2026-02-16 3:54 p.m., Adam H. Kerman wrote:

BTR1701 <atropos@mac.com> wrote:

Ontario is much closer to California as these things go. When I lived in
London (Ontario), there was a provincial park not too far away that
regularly had deer and some of the locals noticed that the deer were
rather thin and scruffy-looking. They had also seen Bambi and decided
that these poor deer were hungry so they needed to be fed. Before too
long, the government was putting out food for them and, what do you
know, the deer population positively boomed! (A result even an idiot
could have predicted: put deer on welfare and there are going to be more
deer!)

Years ago when I was working visits at Camp David, the Marines there talked >about how the deer population was so out-of-control that they were literally >clearing the forest floor of all new growth. They'd eat the sapling trees and >bushes before they could get big enough to survive and as a result, other than >the old growth trees, the forest was completely bare, which was a problem >because the thick forest undergrowth is a significant security feature for >Camp David. It blocks lines of sight to the presidential cabin, etc. and now >it was gone, so the Secret Service and the Marines wanted to do something >about the deer. They put out a solicitation for hunters in the area to hold a >mass cull.

Of course PETA and the other eco-kooks threw a fit, claiming it was kinder to >the deer to let them starve and freeze to death than to cull the herd down to >a manageable level and donate the venison to local homeless shelters. They >held protests and threatened injunctions, basically all the crap they normally >do to get in the way of normal life.

I get trying to protect animals but this is just being cruel to the
deer. You have to manage a herd and if they are running out of food
it's beneficial to the herd and the forest to remove many of the
animals. Whether that be killing them or capturing and moving them
elsewhere (much more expensive) it's still better than letting the
entire herd starve.

Rather than fight it, the government publicly conceded, waited a few months >for the whole thing to blow over, then quietly brought in the ATF at night >with silenced rifles and NVGs and had them shoot hundreds of deer. They loaded >the deer into big freezer trucks and took them halfway across the country >where a sudden influx of venison at shelters wouldn't draw any notice and >within a few months, the forest started growing back.

The only problem is that by using stealth mode, PETA was able to claim victory >and say, "See? If you just leave nature alone, it solves its own problems."

--- PyGate Linux v1.5.11
* Origin: Dragon's Lair, PyGate NNTP<>Fido Gate (3:633/10)

On 2026-02-16 6:50 p.m., BTR1701 wrote:

On Feb 16, 2026 at 3:28:46 PM PST, "Rhino" <no_offline_contact@example.com> wrote:

On 2026-02-16 3:54 p.m., Adam H. Kerman wrote:

BTR1701 <atropos@mac.com> wrote:

CALIFORNIA:

The Governor of California is jogging with his dog on a nature trail. A >>>> coyote jumps out and attacks the governor's dog, then bites the
governor. The governor starts to intervene, then reflects on the movie >>>> BAMBI and realizes he should stop because the coyote is only doing what >>>> is natural.

While the story made me smile and there is plenty of truth in it, one must
assume the coyote is rabid and is not doing what is natural. Why didn't >>> the dog alert?

I tend to walk my dog overnight. I don't wake up in the middle of the
night every night, but when I do, the dog is always ready and willing. >>> We have encountered juvenile coyotes. The dog always alerts but acts
more like encountering another dog being walked than danger. In an
afternoon walk, we have encountered foxes. I have no idea if there are >>> wolves around here but we've never encountered one.

The most reaction I get from the dog is upon encountering the most
dangerous creature of all, a squirrel.

TEXAS:

The Governor of Texas is jogging with his dog on a nature trail. A coyote
jumps out and attacks the governor's dog. The governor shoots the coyote >>>> with
his state-issued pistol and keeps jogging.

He shot the animal? Doesn't he know that you drop an anvil on his head? >>>

The governor has spent 50 cents on a .45-caliber hollow point cartridge. The
buzzards eat the dead coyote.

And that, my friends, is why California is broke and Texas is not.

(h/t to anim8r for finding this for me.)

Ontario is much closer to California as these things go. When I lived in
London (Ontario), there was a provincial park not too far away that
regularly had deer and some of the locals noticed that the deer were
rather thin and scruffy-looking. They had also seen Bambi and decided
that these poor deer were hungry so they needed to be fed. Before too
long, the government was putting out food for them and, what do you
know, the deer population positively boomed! (A result even an idiot
could have predicted: put deer on welfare and there are going to be more
deer!)

Years ago when I was working visits at Camp David, the Marines there talked about how the deer population was so out-of-control that they were literally clearing the forest floor of all new growth. They'd eat the sapling trees and bushes before they could get big enough to survive and as a result, other than
the old growth trees, the forest was completely bare, which was a problem because the thick forest undergrowth is a significant security feature for Camp David. It blocks lines of sight to the presidential cabin, etc. and now it was gone, so the Secret Service and the Marines wanted to do something about the deer. They put out a solicitation for hunters in the area to hold a mass cull.

Of course PETA and the other eco-kooks threw a fit, claiming it was kinder to the deer to let them starve and freeze to death than to cull the herd down to a manageable level and donate the venison to local homeless shelters. They held protests and threatened injunctions, basically all the crap they normally
do to get in the way of normal life.

Rather than fight it, the government publicly conceded, waited a few months for the whole thing to blow over, then quietly brought in the ATF at night with silenced rifles and NVGs and had them shoot hundreds of deer. They loaded
the deer into big freezer trucks and took them halfway across the country where a sudden influx of venison at shelters wouldn't draw any notice and within a few months, the forest started growing back.

The only problem is that by using stealth mode, PETA was able to claim victory
and say, "See? If you just leave nature alone, it solves its own problems."

Don't you just want to rub the smirk off their uber-righteous little faces?

But good for whoever authorized the stealth cull for finally solving the problem properly. I was surprised that London UK also has a deer over-population but they do an annual cull and it doesn't seem to bother anyone despite the country being famously full of animal lovers.

--
Rhino

--- PyGate Linux v1.5.11
* Origin: Dragon's Lair, PyGate NNTP<>Fido Gate (3:633/10)

On Mon, 16 Feb 2026 20:54:04 -0000 (UTC), "Adam H. Kerman"
<ahk@chinet.com> wrote:

While the story made me smile and there is plenty of truth in it, one must >assume the coyote is rabid and is not doing what is natural. Why didn't
the dog alert?

I tend to walk my dog overnight. I don't wake up in the middle of the
night every night, but when I do, the dog is always ready and willing.
We have encountered juvenile coyotes. The dog always alerts but acts
more like encountering another dog being walked than danger. In an
afternoon walk, we have encountered foxes. I have no idea if there are
wolves around here but we've never encountered one.

The most reaction I get from the dog is upon encountering the most
dangerous creature of all, a squirrel.

I'm not a dog lover but my late wife (ir will be 4 years in about 3
weeks) very definitely was and when she passed the responsibility for
Beau-dog passed to me (he's 12 so probably 2 or 3 more years at most).

That means 2 walks a day - a long one during the day, a short one at
night. My adult daughter who lives with me works from home 3 days a
week, downtown 2 days - so she does the day walks on weekends, I do on
weekdays and we switch on weekends.

Our dog regularly wants to bark like mad at the woods across the
street at night which terrifies me since one never know what's in the
woods - and we have had our fences damaged twice by bears in the area.
So when he woofs into the woods it's "ok buddy let's get outa here!
NOW!"

I enjoy the day walks, the night walks not so much

--- PyGate Linux v1.5.12
* Origin: Dragon's Lair, PyGate NNTP<>Fido Gate (3:633/10)

On Mon, 16 Feb 2026 20:54:04 -0000 (UTC), "Adam H. Kerman"
<ahk@chinet.com> wrote:

The Governor of Texas is jogging with his dog on a nature trail. A coyote >>jumps out and attacks the governor's dog. The governor shoots the coyote with >>his state-issued pistol and keeps jogging.

He shot the animal? Doesn't he know that you drop an anvil on his head?

I didn't know cartoons were on-topic in this newsgroup :)

--- PyGate Linux v1.5.12
* Origin: Dragon's Lair, PyGate NNTP<>Fido Gate (3:633/10)

On Mon, 16 Feb 2026 18:01:50 -0500, Rhino
<no_offline_contact@example.com> wrote:

While the story made me smile and there is plenty of truth in it, one must >> assume the coyote is rabid and is not doing what is natural.

Why? We only know that the coyote attacked the dog, not that the coyote
was rabid. It's reasonable that it was tested for rabies in any case but >maybe it was just ultra-aggressive (or stupid).

Because the cost of being wrong is a LOT higher if the critter is
rabid than if he isn't.

Though I laughed hard at that story.

--- PyGate Linux v1.5.12
* Origin: Dragon's Lair, PyGate NNTP<>Fido Gate (3:633/10)

On Mon, 16 Feb 2026 18:28:46 -0500, Rhino
<no_offline_contact@example.com> wrote:

https://thamesriver.on.ca/parks-recreation-natural-areas/londons-esas/sifton-bog/white-tailed-deer-in-sifton-bog/

Pathetic! They first noticed the problem officially in 2000. Nine years >later, when the report ended, they seemed to have done absolutely
nothing but study the matter without coming to any conclusions except
that a small bow hunt to test the feasibility of that approach should
NOT be done and that maybe a fine for people who fed the deer should be >considered although they never implemented it. A classic example of
"moving at the speed of government"....

That's an unusually sketchy response from the London, ON I Know.

It would be funny if it weren't incredibly sad.

--- PyGate Linux v1.5.12
* Origin: Dragon's Lair, PyGate NNTP<>Fido Gate (3:633/10)